#thankfulnovember
There has been a trend taking shape over the last few years on social media of people posting for the entire month of November what they are thankful for. They post something new every single day that they are thankful for. I started participating the first year I found out about it but as often happens, it slowly fizzled out after about a week. Life got busy, things came up and I found myself forgetting to do it. It became a task or chore and suddenly it was difficult to find something to post that I was thankful about that sounded both wise and sentimental. My human nature took over and as ashamed as I am to admit, I felt like I had to compete with people to have the best "thankful" post. So I stopped posting.
I think it's great that people are taking time to stop and think about what they are thankful for but should it really be limited to only one month a year? I've grown and changed a lot since turning 40 and the biggest thing I have learned is to stop wanting more and to be happy where I am at the time. Everything will work out in the end. I definitely have to work at it, sometimes on an hourly basis but the thing that matters is that I am working at it.
This time last year I was in a dark place. We had moved clear across the country to what I thought was my dream job. Once we were here things took a very different turn. We were far away from our friends and family in a tiny little apartment with a five year old who was struggling to adjust to the loss of seeing his big brother and grandparents every day. He was struggling with not having five acres to run and play and ride his bike, he was having asthma flare-ups every time we turned around. On top of that we had financial issues, car issues, apartment issues. Tom's memory and cognitive problems took a dramatic turn for the worse and to top it off my dream job turned out to be a nightmare. I couldn't see the light at the end of the tunnel. I didn't want to celebrate the holidays, I didn't want to talk to anyone or go anywhere. This mindset persisted for several months. I couldn't understand why I couldn't pull myself out of the hole, why must I continue with such a negative view of the world. I just wanted to go inside my blanket fort with a good book and never come out.
All I could think about was if I could get this other job, if I could have more money we could do xyz, if only....if only...if only. Instead of being thankful that we had a warm comfortable place to live, I had three healthy kids and a loving husband, I had a job that I loved doing, I was constantly wondering what if, or if only I could have/do/be this. I lost sight of the things that truly bring me happiness. I lost sight of how incredibly blessed and lucky I was. I was miserable and it was rubbing of on everyone else around me. I wasn't enjoying my kids, Tom and I were barely co-existing and living like roommates rather than husband and wife. I was consumed by negativity and I didn't like what it was doing to me. No matter what I tried nothing was going right.
Then one morning I was driving to work and I got tired of the snotty people on the morning show I usually listened to and started scanning the stations. I landed on a Christian music station. I hadn't listened to Christian music since we left Colorado. I had been distancing myself from my faith for a while. I didn't want to be associated with the kinds of people who were so filled with hypocrisy and hate disguised as righteousness. As one of my favorite songs came on I realized this was what I had been missing all along. I could feel the peace and calm envelope me like a warm fuzzy blanket and the tears began to flow. Here I am sitting at a stop light sobbing like a baby because I finally felt the pressure of everything lifting from my shoulders. I realized how much the negative thoughts were drowning me and my world. Once I realized I needed a shift in my thinking, my moods became better and I was better able to have positive thoughts. Every little thing that happened didn't turn into the end of the world crisis. It was just another hill to climb but I wasn't climbing it alone. I listen to that radio station every morning on my way to work. The rare occasion that I don't I can really tell because I have to work harder to not be harsh and cynical about everything. It is funny how things can affect people in different ways. I knew I was always affected by music but didn't realize how strong my connection was to it.
Fast forward a year and here we are today. I am so thankful for my life. I am living the best life I can. I have a job I absolutely love doing, my kids are happy and mostly healthy, Tom isn't better but he isn't worse and WE are doing better with each other. Are there things I wish we could improve? Absolutely! But we are a work in progress and those will all come in time. I am happy where I am at this moment in time. Does it always feel that way? Nope! There are days where I start thinking of how I wish things were but then I try to catch myself and stop, reminding myself that we are good where we are. Our journey isn't over, this is just a pit stop on our road trip. We will make the best of our time here until it is time to move on to our next, and hopefully, last stop.
So my point to this whole rambling post is be thankful, always. If you need to start with #thankfulnovember then by all means get started! It is a great starting point to launch yourself into your best life ever.
I think it's great that people are taking time to stop and think about what they are thankful for but should it really be limited to only one month a year? I've grown and changed a lot since turning 40 and the biggest thing I have learned is to stop wanting more and to be happy where I am at the time. Everything will work out in the end. I definitely have to work at it, sometimes on an hourly basis but the thing that matters is that I am working at it.
This time last year I was in a dark place. We had moved clear across the country to what I thought was my dream job. Once we were here things took a very different turn. We were far away from our friends and family in a tiny little apartment with a five year old who was struggling to adjust to the loss of seeing his big brother and grandparents every day. He was struggling with not having five acres to run and play and ride his bike, he was having asthma flare-ups every time we turned around. On top of that we had financial issues, car issues, apartment issues. Tom's memory and cognitive problems took a dramatic turn for the worse and to top it off my dream job turned out to be a nightmare. I couldn't see the light at the end of the tunnel. I didn't want to celebrate the holidays, I didn't want to talk to anyone or go anywhere. This mindset persisted for several months. I couldn't understand why I couldn't pull myself out of the hole, why must I continue with such a negative view of the world. I just wanted to go inside my blanket fort with a good book and never come out.
All I could think about was if I could get this other job, if I could have more money we could do xyz, if only....if only...if only. Instead of being thankful that we had a warm comfortable place to live, I had three healthy kids and a loving husband, I had a job that I loved doing, I was constantly wondering what if, or if only I could have/do/be this. I lost sight of the things that truly bring me happiness. I lost sight of how incredibly blessed and lucky I was. I was miserable and it was rubbing of on everyone else around me. I wasn't enjoying my kids, Tom and I were barely co-existing and living like roommates rather than husband and wife. I was consumed by negativity and I didn't like what it was doing to me. No matter what I tried nothing was going right.
Then one morning I was driving to work and I got tired of the snotty people on the morning show I usually listened to and started scanning the stations. I landed on a Christian music station. I hadn't listened to Christian music since we left Colorado. I had been distancing myself from my faith for a while. I didn't want to be associated with the kinds of people who were so filled with hypocrisy and hate disguised as righteousness. As one of my favorite songs came on I realized this was what I had been missing all along. I could feel the peace and calm envelope me like a warm fuzzy blanket and the tears began to flow. Here I am sitting at a stop light sobbing like a baby because I finally felt the pressure of everything lifting from my shoulders. I realized how much the negative thoughts were drowning me and my world. Once I realized I needed a shift in my thinking, my moods became better and I was better able to have positive thoughts. Every little thing that happened didn't turn into the end of the world crisis. It was just another hill to climb but I wasn't climbing it alone. I listen to that radio station every morning on my way to work. The rare occasion that I don't I can really tell because I have to work harder to not be harsh and cynical about everything. It is funny how things can affect people in different ways. I knew I was always affected by music but didn't realize how strong my connection was to it.
Fast forward a year and here we are today. I am so thankful for my life. I am living the best life I can. I have a job I absolutely love doing, my kids are happy and mostly healthy, Tom isn't better but he isn't worse and WE are doing better with each other. Are there things I wish we could improve? Absolutely! But we are a work in progress and those will all come in time. I am happy where I am at this moment in time. Does it always feel that way? Nope! There are days where I start thinking of how I wish things were but then I try to catch myself and stop, reminding myself that we are good where we are. Our journey isn't over, this is just a pit stop on our road trip. We will make the best of our time here until it is time to move on to our next, and hopefully, last stop.
So my point to this whole rambling post is be thankful, always. If you need to start with #thankfulnovember then by all means get started! It is a great starting point to launch yourself into your best life ever.
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