Hello....Again

I grew up listening to Neil Diamond music and I just love this song. I think the lyrics are very appropriate for what is to come in our lives very soon.  We just found out that Tom is being transferred to Virginia. He will be on the USS Cole and will be going out to sea on a regular basis. In fact there is a possibility he will have to leave within a few days/weeks of us arriving in November. So not only will we be living in a state that neither of us have ever visited....we will not have any family or friends when we get there and I will possibly be alone with my children for the holidays. To say I am not a little nervous or scared would be a lie but I believe the years I spent as a single mother helped prepare me for this. That's the funny thing about God and his plans...when you are going through something you can't understand why He would ever make you go through such difficulties, heartache, etc but had it not been for those years I wouldn't have been prepared for what is to come. Although I think if Tom had any inkling that he would eventually be forced to join the Navy he may not have married me after all!! LOL I am glad he did join and I think he is too. It has changed us, both as a couple and individually in such profound ways it is incomprehensible. I used to dream of having a marriage like ours, one that I knew would weather the storm no matter how violent. I never thought those dreams would come to pass and had you asked me two years ago when we were still living in Calhan if I thought we would make it my answer would have been a resounding No. See the thing is many people are not aware of the fact that Tom and I almost lost our way to each other over one of the most common things to break up a marriage- finances. Of course that wasn't the only thing but it was the main culprit. When he left for boot camp I wasn't sure if he would be coming back home to me or going to his mother's but when I started getting those letters from him I saw the man I had fallen in love with all over again. I knew if he had the opportunity to write me a letter he would have written it on a Sunday and mailed it that Monday and it would be sitting in our mailbox on Thursday. I religiously counted the days and on Thursday I was so fidgety until that clock struck noon and I knew I could drive down to the post office to check the mail. Then I would sit in the post office parking lot devouring every word over and over again for a good 15 minutes. When ever you read about a person going to boot camp they tell you that the most important thing you can do is write them letters, which I did about every other day or so, and how important those letters are to your loved one. What they don't tell you is how important the letters you are lucky enough to receive back are like paper gold. Especially since they aren't always allowed to write in boot camp. Anyhow I digress....those letters began giving me a glimpse of the person I thought I had lost to anger, frustration, and hurt feelings. When we were able to drive to Chicago a couple of months later to watch his graduation I was more nervous than a blushing bride. I knew my husband had changed and I had hoped I had changed some as well but was it enough? Would he still want to be in our lives? That first bone crushing hug there on the floor of the auditorium told me everything I ever needed to know. I still felt the same safety, warmth and unconditional love I had always felt in his arms. Fast forward to present day....the Navy has challenged him mentally and physically beyond anything he ever imagined and in doing so it has challenged me as his wife and us as a couple. We have learned to lean on each other and God more than ever which has brought us to a new level of closeness that I am just loving. I just wish time would slow down to give me longer to enjoy each and every day with him. So while I am up for the challenge of moving our family to another unfamiliar place I am not so sure about being ready for the challenge of not having him next to me everyday, every night. When I hear that song I imagine him sitting in his bunk on the ship and waiting for the ability to use his cell phone to call home, and me at home staring at our wedding photos wishing I could hear his voice....
Okay, okay enough of the sappy....I am happy to say I am back at my blog, although I won't promise to write more because every time I do it never happens. So maybe if I don't promise to than I will get to it more often! I am considering writing more of my short story...I know it had a couple of fans out there and I hope they would be interested in reading more if they haven't totally forgotten it existed.  I do think it's time I finish it though. I am getting to a point in my life where I am feeling the need to tie up loose ends, finish old projects and feel like I have accomplished something.

Another avenue I have ventured down is the world of cooking and baking, as evidenced by my husband's ever growing waistline! I have found a new love for trying new recipes and am discovering that I am not half bad at it either. I recently made some cake balls for a book club meeting, had so many left over that I gave some to my teacher and classmates, as well as sending them to Tom's work with him. I have had numerous requests for the recipe and I can't wait to try more combination's and decorations. They weren't hard to make just a little tedious. It makes it a little easier that you can actually take several days to complete them. Who knows, maybe I will end up making them for money someday...maybe they will become a featured special in our restaurant someday if we ever get that up and running. So that's whats going on in our world and on that note I am going to leave you with the timeless classic...Hello, Again by Neil Diamond.